I try to be.
But I’m not.
For several reasons.
1) Scripture says I’m not. Jeremiah 17:9 says, “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?” And Romans 3:10 is pretty clear, too: “As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one. There is none that understandeth, there is none that seeketh after God.” (My italics added.)
2) I don’t love others the way I should. I’m petty and selfish and I think of myself far too often.
3) I tire of pretending that I’m a nice person. But I know so many nice people that I’m afraid to let them see the petty and selfish real me.
4) I’m too … cynical. Maybe that’s too strong. Prosaic? or skeptical maybe. Because I’m not a good Christian, I judge others. I second guess their motives.
5) I don’t really care about theology and Calvinism vs Arminianism or pre-Trib vs. post-Trib, Creationist-young-earth or Intelligent Design old earth. Those arguments just get people riled up and angry and give them an excuse to hold a grudge here on earth. It’s not going to matter even a little bit when we get to heaven. There’s no entrance exam! In his January 29th blog Donald Miller made that point. He said God will look up and say, “Hey, you! I know you! Come on in.”
6) I have a gay friend who is dying. I’m not trying to convert him. He says he loves Jesus. That’s good enough for me, but not for some others who think I should be urging him to repudiate his lifestyle and sexual preferences.
Those are the reasons I’m not a good Christian.
But … Jesus loves me anyway. And that’s pretty great and makes all of that other stuff meaningless.